Blackout Cake

As a precursor, I'll try to structure my posts as follows:

Brief blurb
Original Recipe Links
Important/Helpful Notes
Ingredients I used
Steps I followed (+ helpful notes in italics)
Final Thoughts


Blurb
I, like many other millenials, am obsessed with Bon Appetit's youtube channel.  They have capitalized, perfectly, on a generation's desire for consumable content, produced by highly skilled professionals that simultaneously relatable and perfectly polished. I enjoy Rick's recipes and style, so when he posted the video in May, I KNEW I had to try it.  I also knew then, as I do now, that my household is cutting back on refined/processed sugar. Finally, my birthday provided provenance - and the recipe did NOT disappoint.

The original recipe is: blackout cake + pudding filling + frosting
I baked: blackout cake + toasted coconut caramel + frosting

The toasted coconut caramel recipe was lifted from Claire's Baking School - we were hosting an outdoor party, and keep our AC warm, so pudding was of no interest.

Original Recipes
BA Blackout Cake Video
BA Blackout Cake Recipe
BA Claire Makes (Toasted Coconut Caramel) Filling

Important notes:

• As with all baking, I find it so helpful to read recipe fully.
• RT = room temperature
• AP = all purpose
• I did not find it necessary to premeasure dry ingredients before mixing.  For my 2nd bake I realized it was better to separate wet to bring to RT.
• Original recipe calls for dark brown sugar, but I preferentially use turbinado sugar - I added approximately 1 tbsp of light maple syrup to compensate.
• Because I baked separately, I did not need to use my stand mixer - hand whisking was so perfectly easy, and I had no noticeable difference with final product.
• I had to double the recipe to produce a big enough cake.  partially because the first batch did not rise quite enough, and I did not split the batter well (my first 10" base was not tall enough).
• base layer = 2 x 10 inch torted into 4 layers
• top layer = 2x 6 inch
• My first base was not tall enough to torte, so I compensated in the 2nd
• My caramel seized on adding the heavy cream, partially because I didn't know what I was doing, but mostly because my smaller measuring cup was occupied (i was adding 1/4 cup, then measuring another amount, then adding).  In hindsight I needed to add sugar more slowly, measure all my cream and pour more slowly, while simultaneously stirring.  My heat was also too high, and the caramel basically started boiling (stovetop user error)

Original Recipe
yield: two 8-inch deep rounds
servings: 12 slices

Cake Ingredients
Unsalted butter, room temperature (for pans)
0.75 cup Dutch-processed cocoa powder, plus more for pans
1.5 cups all-purpose flour
1.5 teaspoons baking soda
0.75 teaspoon baking powder
1 large egg, room temperature
1 large egg yolk, room temperature
1.5 cups (packed) turbinado sugar
1 tablespoon maple syrup (sub molasses or golden syrup)
0.75 cup sour cream, room temperature
5 tablespoons vegetable oil
0.75 cups hot water
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
0.75 teaspoon kosher salt

Frosting
1 cup heavy cream
3 tablespoons maple syrup (sub molasses or  golden syrup)
⅛ teaspoon kosher salt
12 ounces bittersweet chocolate, chopped
0.75  cup sour cream, room temperature
2 tablespoons unsalted butter, room temperature

Toasted Coconut Caramel
2 cups shredded coconut (or flakes)
1 cup heavy cream
pinch of kosher salt

Cake Steps
1. Prep
- Set out anything that needs to be RT (cracked eggs, sour cream, butter). This can take several hours.

- Arrange a rack in center of oven; preheat to 350°

- Line pans with parchment paper

- Grease (on top of parchment) with butter, then dust with cocoa

- Tap out excess.

2. Dry

- Sift flour, baking soda, baking powder, and cocoa powder into a medium bowl

- Whisk to combine.

I measured all dry into a sieve, then pushed through with a chopstick.  Totally appropriate, as long as your bottom bowl is deep enough.

3. Wet
- Whisk egg, egg yolk, brown sugar, sour cream, oil, vanilla, salt.

I precracked eggs and premeasured sour cream (in separate bowls), to bring to RT. This made for very easy addition. You can store egg white in fridge (for use in 1 day) or freezer (for much later use).

4. Combine
- Whisk dry ingredients into wet, until just barely combined.
- Whisk hot water.
- Mixture should get shiny.

No need to add dry in parts - you can dump and go.

5. Divide and Bake
- Divide batter between prepared pans.
- Bake 25-35 min, until a tester inserted into the center comes out clean. Time will vary for smaller layers.
- Transfer pans to a wire rack; let cake cool completely in pan.
- Run a knife (or sharp thin spatula) around cake's circumference to separate from pan.
- Invert onto a plate (or your hand, but be careful if your hands run hot - caketop may stick to your hand). Gently peel the parchment off.
- Invert again (so it's right side up).

You can toast coconut while your oven is still hot.I baked both small and large together on the middle rack, with no appreciable issues.Cake can be baked 2 days ahead. Store tightly wrapped at room temperature.  For same day prep, chill the cake before torting and assembly. 

Frosting
- Bring cream, syrup, and salt to a boil in a large saucepan over medium-high heat.
- Remove from heat
- Stir in chocolate, sour cream, and butter.
- Let sit, stirring occasionally, until chocolate and butter are melted and mixture is smooth and no streaks of white remain.
- Transfer to a medium bowl, let sit at RT, stirring every 30 minutes or so, until thickened and spreadable.
- It will look ridiculous (like a broken chocolate sauce) but eventually will start to thicken.
- Stir until smooth.

My kitchen is very warm so I chilled frosting 5 minutes at a time. (BA says chill if warmer than 72°, otherwise let sit on counter for 1.5 hours, stirring every 30 min).

Stir to combine cooler outer edges with warmer center, then chill another 5 minutes. Repeat until it reaches the consistency of sour cream.

Filling


Assembly
- Using a serrated knife and sawing in long, even strokes, carefully torte cakes (cut them into 2 layers).
- Set aside the 3 best layers for use. Identify your layer order (tallest on bottom, most even on top)
- Crumble any extra layer into fine crumbs

crumbling can be done by hand (beware the cake is extremely moist) or push through a wire rack set inside a rimmed baking sheet (using a gentle circle motion

- Spread a small amount of caramel filling on a cake stand, tray,  or cake holder.
- Set your tallest layer, cut side up.
- Place a frosting ring around the outer layer of cake (to keep filling from oozing out)
- Spread filling in the middle.
- Put on your second layer
- Repeat (frosting ring, filling)

I had to go semi sparingly because I did not know my caramel yield relative to number of layers.  I placed a much thinner caramel layer between the cake's base layer and topper. You can use frosting+caramel to even out torting inconsistencies. Chill cake (approx 1 hr) before frosting.

- Lay down a crumb coat (spread a thin layer of frosting) all over top and sides of chilled cake.
- The frosting on top should be as smooth and level as possible.
- If using the crumb coat outside, the sides can look messy; Otherwise make that shit clean & smooth.
- Chill between layers of frosting for easier application.
- If applying crumb coat: press crumbs to the sides of the cake turning as you go.

Per BA: Cake can be assembled 1 day ahead. Chill uncovered.

Let sit (for a little while) before serving. 

Passing through airports

I travel somewhat frequently. I’ve always paid attention to the different “travel hacks” – how do I make travel smoother, easier, more efficient, more convenient…  It’s always hard not to notice the parents in this snippet of their day.  From the tiny noodles, to toddlers who won’t sit still; the 8 year olds who think they can do it all on their own, and the teenagers too cool to have anything to do with their adults.

It’s nearly impossible for me to limit my travel packing – how do these parents accomplish it without bringing ten million bags?  What are their secrets?

Today flying from dallas to atlanta, I notice this curious bright eyed hapa toddler (East Asian + White) observing the world from her mother’s arm.

My heart sings. My ovaries squeeze.

As they moved through the airport I wondered, how did she stay unflappably cool – Mother and Baby?  I wanted to ask all the questions and unload all the doubts.  How do you do it? How do you talk to her? How do you raise her? How do you impart what you know, and the multitude of everything you don’t? How do you leave your hangups at the door, and give them the room to grow and open doors of their own making?

I take my seat at the gate – and they sit next to me – affording the delightful privilege of voyeur.  Mom offers, calmly and evenly, a few different snacks – showing and asking Baby about fruits, then cheese, before Baby decides on goldfish.  Baby sticks her hand measuredly in and out that magical cup that lets fishes out when you want but keeps them inside as it knocks around Mom’s bag.

Mom pulls out a book! And baby reads along.  They sit and finish their book, and Baby is so content.  until she decides she wants to walk around.

Mom is so cool and calm and unruffled through it all.

Is this the secret to raising a baby? You stay calm through it all and never let baby see you sweat?

Eventually a middle aged Indian couple sits across from us.  They too look at baby and family.  I see something in their eyes.  Maybe recognition, maybe curiosity.  There is more than a passing glance for them, and I think of my own family.

Do they know that in this moment, I’m watching my full circle?  In them I see my husband’s parents? In Baby I see my own possible future? In Mom I see the veneer of traveling mother traits I would aspire to?

Clearly I am struggling with my motherhood decision – whether this is right for me and my immediate family of 2.

As 31 knocks, louder, and my ovaries approach the decrepit geriatric Cliff of 35, I hear this bell tolling. I feel this weight on my shoulders and inside.  Do I want this? Is this right for me?

In this age and era of choice, I HAVE this choice.  Our mothers before us did not.  So many women in the US and around the world, still do not.  Their reproductive rights are restricted and limited by men deciding in boardrooms, behind glass walls and closed doors, in ivory towers both literal and figurative, shaped by centuries of culture.

And here I am. A woman of privilege, and choice, and power.  I can choose.  But what do I choose?

For me this decision is complex, and I have yet to find a way to make it less so.

I think of the ever growing, endless pressure of climate change.  What is the world that I will leave behind? What is the legacy that my child will experience? And their children? Their children’s children?  Am I confining them to constant worry about sea level rise, floods, extreme weather, extreme heat, a lack of reliable food sources or famine, disease? We know these will drive political instability as governments and people fight over increasing limited resources. I recognize my privilege means I likely won’t experience much directly… and if I do, my family will have the resources and education to overcome.   But the fact remains these worries will be ever present and ever increasing.  And my child may not have the wherewithal and resources to deal with these things. They may worry about these things for their own children, in a more visceral way.

In my narrow, shortsighted way, I think about what that means for my little family of 2.  Gone are weekend trips, late nights out, quiet nights in.  While N’s career will pause, mine will take a hiatus with diminished returns when I rejoin the workforce.  Gone is our financial buffer – though to be clear we would by no means suffer.  These feel small, and petty, but they are nonetheless true.

A life without a child would likely mean true global careers - based abroad. Something we both thought we'd do.  Though there are some who raise global citizens by parenting abroad, this is not a path we are likely to choose with a small human.  But our domestic careers as they stand afford us, again, the privilege to do both domestic and global work that is rewarding, fulfilling, and financially stable (for him at least).

We love each other, naturally, N and I. But the sheer and absolute terror of loving a child, who relies on you and you alone for life, is overwhelming.  It is absolutely petrifying to have your own emotions wrapped up in a tiny human, moving in a world that you cannot control or make safe for them.

As we look ahead to old age, what then do we do in our dottage?  Our parents in many ways live for us their children.  We have the tacit and spoken understanding that we will be their caregivers.  What of us? What will give us purpose as we age? There is, as much as I am loath to admit, something special about being the parent of an adult child.

I think of N and I can see the ways he would be a wonderful, though firm, father. I wonder how he would indulge this non existent tiny human.  Would he share his love of flavors and cooking?  Would he calmly explain algebra and trigonometry?  Would he teach (real) futbol? It's hard to see N with a noodle, but sometimes I see these snippets and wonder if I'm depriving N and the noodle the joys of each other.

And with all this I haven't considered what it is to be a woman.  Trying. Pregnant. Post-Partum.  I am so completely terrified by post partum depression and psychosis.  I worry that I'm higher risk.  I worry about how I will reconcile my ME-ness, with Mother-ness, with ambition and drive.

real housewife of ATL: No Churn | Fresh Mint | Eggless | Ice Cream

as an ode to my kitchen efforts as a recent housewife, my first post is about my attempt to make eggless no churn mint ice-cream with fresh mint!

as a personal note, the significance of this is that my husband N loves oreo-mint ice cream (which is challenging to find in any company but Breyer's).  his mom (let's call her Mummy), does not eat eggs (like many Indian vegetarians). so this recipe will hopefully satisfy their tastebuds, and of course my own, too!

after scouring the internet and reading entirely too many recipes, i've decided on a method. maybe.

so here's debate 1:
fresh mint VS peppermint

since we grow mint, there's quite literally no reason to not use our yummy mint. especially since they likely will not make it past fall.

now, welcome to debate 2:
steeped mint VS minced VS steeped+minced

what i've decided to do is:
steep the mint leaves in a cream (which should not be allowed to boil, rather simmer gently)
~~as i'm writing this before starting the process, i may or may not pulverize the leaves with my immersion blender~~

on to debate 3 (which one would think precludes 1 and 2... and yet here we are): the question of which creams in quite literally any combination
whole milk
half & half (weird, right?)
heavy whipping cream
heavy cream (is this actually different from the above?)
condensed milk

given my method of steeping:
i must allow the cream to cool off, before combining them.  i've decided to use
heavy whipping and condensed milk, since that seems to be the most common combination

debate 4:
do i whip the heavy cream into stiff peaks prior to folding? or do i simply fold them together?
~~it seems like whipping first will yield the best results, so here's to that!~~


and finally: what the hell is the recipe?
the closest approximation is Beth Dunham's (link below), which i've repasted here.  the colored text indicates my morning-after tips and tricks based on the finished product


Ingredients:

• 1/2 cup loosely packed fresh mint leaves (or however much you have or want to use)
• 2 cups whipping cream (i used heavy whipping cream)
• 1 can sweetened condensed milk (300ml)
• 1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract i "forgot" to include this ---rather, i didn't think it would be necessary.
• 1/4 teaspoon pure peppermint extract (optional) as above, i wanted to use natural mint flavor.
• 160 grams dark chocolate bar - coarsely chopped this being my first attempt at ice cream, i didn't want to waste chocolate if the ice cream was terrible

Instructions:

• Coarsely chop the mint leaves and combine with the cream in a small saucepan over medium-low heat. Gently warm the mixture, stirring occasionally, until it feels hot to the touch. Don't let it come a boil. Remove the pan from the heat, cover and let steep for 20-30 minutes.
• on my electric stove top (the worst, i know) the setting i opted for was the 2nd or 3rd bar up from "low".  of course i was multitasking and the cream came to a boil.... but i carried on regardless!
• Chill the infusion until it very cold by placing the bowl in a larger bowl filled with ice or by placing it in the refrigerator for a few hours. The cream won't whip properly unless it is very cold, so don't try and rush this step.
• Strain the cream into a bowl, squeezing the mint in order to release as much liquid as possible.
• In the bowl of your stand-mixer, or using a large whisk, whip the cream until it holds gentle peaks. i tried to whisk by hand, but of course i was pressed for time when i got to this stage.  i switched to an immersion blender, but i didn't quite get the cream to hold stiff peaks... hence the ice cream is not quite ice cream today.
• here's a video of what whipping heavy cream by hand should look like, including stiff peaks
• Taste the cream to test for flavour, you may want to add a few drops of peppermint extract if it's not quite minty enough for your liking. it was very minty! and refreshing at this point.
• In a separate bowl, stir together the sweetened condensed milk with the vanilla until combined. again, i skipped the vanilla because i wasn't in the mood
• First fold in about a cup of the whipped cream to the sweetened condensed milk to lighten it a bit. Then add this mixture into the remaining whipped cream and continue to fold in until everything has been evenly incorporated.
• Finally, stir the dark chocolate bits through the mixture.
• Transfer to a container for freezing. This can be a chilled glass, chilled ceramic or metal loaf pan.
• i like to minimize the number of dirty dishes, and maximize the amount of batter/cream/food that makes it into whatever i'm working on that day.  so what i did was
• chill a pyrex bread loaf container (the final container for freezing the ice cream) when i started to warm the cream.
• after warming, i used a large measuring cup to chill the cream in the fridge (and i also covered it with plastic wrap).
• after chilling, i poured it all into the chilled glassware to whip the cream
• i reused the large measuring cup to mix the condensed milk and half of the whipped cream
• then reunited the two into the glassware for freezing!
• Cover the surface of the mixture with plastic wrap, and freeze for 5-6 hours until firm.

the internet would have me believe all methods are *essentially* equal... and only intending to make a single batch (this time), i shall happily report back about these results and update the post when i've tried another method.


RESULTS!

• In terms of mintyness, i'm pleased. however the condensed milk has an overpowering flavor of condensed-ness, which might be the reason the original recipe recommended vanilla. 
• in terms of texture, i did get little fat globules (i think that's what they are).
• it is delightfully rich and creamy, with no ice particles (hurrah!!)

And finally,
I'm doing some morning-after research and found some excellent tips & trips listed below
Common Homemade Ice Cream Issues @ Food52

recipe inspirations drawn from:
Beth Dunham
Amy @ The Idea Room
Haley @ Carrots for Michaelmas
Agnes @ Hello, Wonderful

feeling inspired

i already can't imagine what my life will be like after leaving SPH ... i love the interactions that i have every single day. i am impressed with peers and friends. every day i feel confident that positive, wonderful things will be accomplished in big and small ways ... knowing that i'm terrible at maintaining these relationships, i already feel the loss of these immediate interactions as we spread across the US and the world!

half-master summertime blog

so much to catch up on! so i'm going to do a quick debrief, categorize my life, then do longer posts.

April - went to FL and TX for awesome weddings; got aggravating immunizations; met Meri Jaan in AZ and hung out with the sibling; worked my ass off during finals; became a half master;

May - packed up my life and put in the basement; travelled with 2 checked bags, a carry-on and backpack for 4 months; kicked off summer with an epic boat day in the MIA; travelled 20+ hours with Meri Jaan for an engagement party in Belize; kicked it in K-Zoo with mother and Meri Jaan for our engagement katha (live streamed in two countries, no less); went to Chi-town for (more) wedding fun; moved to Grenada for 11 weeks;

June - started working at the Grenadian Ministry of Social Development (developing programming for local DV shelter); endless wedding planning;


since i've got so much to unpack, i'll use the following (self explanatory) tags
- shaadi musings
- grenada musings
- public health musings

the tags will likely be updated as summer progresses!  ...and hopefully i can keep up the blogging

what is going on???

man. everyone has opinions here, feels entitled to and righteous about those opinions. moreover entitled to share them, even when they are patently false. then media, operating under the guise of news, decides to sensationalize irrational pieces from emotional people who are not in an appropriate state of mind or awareness or even have factual basis. especially given the complex healthcare machine that has resulted from the ethos of the country. and all the horseradish is perpetuated through social media. piss off.

what is up with the mistrust of agencies designed to project? no they are not flawless, however being critical requires thinking about ALL policies not just those we disagree with.

what is up with patient entitlement?? no, you don't always know best! or better than people who have extensively studied how to treat your disease? doctors aren't always right, they aren't always free of biases, but generally their actions are thought out, and probably more so than someone who perceives unfair or inadequate treatment without disclosing specific details and doing appropriate discourse on why they received a particular plan of care.

what is the point of going to someone for care then undermining their efforts with chronic and public mistrust?

what is up with the physician hate?

man.

rant.out.

tonight

tonight i feel disconnected.  i have not found a single formal caribbean student organization at the university.  i am disappointed ---i simply cannot be the only one.

much less likely is a graduate student presence for either caribbean descended or work related interest groups.

on more than one occasion i have been told "you're probably going to have to identify with either the Latino student organization, or the African /African American student organizations" ... well ... i am neither.

my other thought for the night has been sparked a few things ... conversation around the new york times article on Shonda Rhimes (and responses)... emma watson's UN speech on feminism ... and the barrage of carnival related pictures, videos and posts on my ever informative facebook feed.

again, i do not stand on a moral soapbox.  i am simply reflecting, hopefully in a culturally humble, inoffensive, unbiased manner.

within each identity (ethnic minority, female gendered) are great inequities.  it is easy to feel them, be cognizant.  but at what point are we obligated, if ever, to take a stance through action?  conversation is wonderful, but stagnant inaction results in perpetuation.

when in a position of prominence and power, are we obligated to take a stance? to be that leader for whatever community may identify with us?  is that placing an unfair burden in an already burdensome situation fraught with the sheer stress associated with finding yourself there -in power, fighting the powers around you, to assert yourself as competent and strong, but understanding and flexible? no, it shouldn't be your burden alone to address or attempt to change.

being marginalised, advocating for something, --we can be typecast.  while it is not our problem to solve, we become bound to the perceptions others have of us and our work.  can we ever extricate ourselves from the big picture associated with us?  can we facilitate (or force) changes in perception?  are we then limited to work in the confines of that identity, because no matter what we do we are restricted?

as women, we should stand up for women.  she for she.  but that times article was just ... she for herself.

how do we stimulate broader conversations on race, ethnicity and the stereotypes?